Today has been a good day so far. I went and looked for a car no luck yet. I wish that all my problems would be wiped away but I know that is impossible. I pray that God gives me he strength to get through it all.
Dennis is growing up way to fast. He is becoming an independent little man. I love him and Jessica with all my heart. I have been trying to fight to keep the family together, its really hard.
Yesterday I woke up at 3:30am and took Amber to work then I went shopping. I finally made it to bed at 2am. I am not feeling very good today I need a nap. I hope everyone gets what they want for Christmas, I pray that I get what I want.
Saturday, November 27, 2010
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Thanksgiving!!!
Happy Thanksgiving to all!!!!
Time to put on some extra weight.....NOT!...today we are going to Golden Coral Buffett for our Thanksgiving meal. NO CLEANING FOR US.
After that i am going to go walking for as long as I can......
I am thankful for all my friends and family. Without out them in my life it would be very lonely. I thank God for second chances..... I pray everyday that things will work out for the best.
Time to put on some extra weight.....NOT!...today we are going to Golden Coral Buffett for our Thanksgiving meal. NO CLEANING FOR US.
After that i am going to go walking for as long as I can......
I am thankful for all my friends and family. Without out them in my life it would be very lonely. I thank God for second chances..... I pray everyday that things will work out for the best.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Bad Day For Life.
Today has been one stressed filled drama. People need to learn to stay out of things that they are not involved in because all it does is start problems for others. I wish we could have peace and let old things be. Me and Dennis walked for about 2 miles today we had a blast. I am down to 224Lbs. Wohoo time to go get some ice cream. just kidding. Taking the weight off is making me feel alot better, I can breath better, sleep better and tie my shoes a whole lot easier. LOL. Getting past the 220 hump is the hardest but I will continue to work hard at it.
Sunday, November 14, 2010
A letter to God
Dear God,
First, I want to say I am sorry I havent talked to you in a while. I havent been a very good servent for you. My life has taken a turn and I know you are with me each and ever second of the day. I have struggled for a long time and I have come to realize that only the good happens when I have you in my life.
I thank you for all the good things you have done in my life. You have always been the rock under my feet, saving me from the quicksand I feel swallowing me up. I've been hurting alot lately but I am giving it all to you. I pray that others will find the peace they seek in thier lives, and they will if they could just dig deep down in thier hearts and ask for your forgiveness.
I pray you give me the strength and knowledge to get through each and everyday. I thank you for giving me such wonderful kids, they mean the world to me. I pray you give me direction in life as I feel so lost right now. Thank you God for everything you have given to me.
Amen
Just a reminder to everyone out there, if things are not going good in your life you all have a friend in Jesus.
First, I want to say I am sorry I havent talked to you in a while. I havent been a very good servent for you. My life has taken a turn and I know you are with me each and ever second of the day. I have struggled for a long time and I have come to realize that only the good happens when I have you in my life.
I thank you for all the good things you have done in my life. You have always been the rock under my feet, saving me from the quicksand I feel swallowing me up. I've been hurting alot lately but I am giving it all to you. I pray that others will find the peace they seek in thier lives, and they will if they could just dig deep down in thier hearts and ask for your forgiveness.
I pray you give me the strength and knowledge to get through each and everyday. I thank you for giving me such wonderful kids, they mean the world to me. I pray you give me direction in life as I feel so lost right now. Thank you God for everything you have given to me.
Amen
Just a reminder to everyone out there, if things are not going good in your life you all have a friend in Jesus.
Verti-glow Bowling
Last night I took Jessica and her friends to verti-glow bowling. We had a blast, they didnt want the night to end. Its been nice being able to do things with Jessica. I wish I could do alot more but the small things are what count to me. I hate the idea of her growing up, feels like im losing a big chunk of myself in the process. She is a great kid with a big heart.
Dennis came back from spending time with his mom. I missed him so much, I wish we didnt have to do the back and forth thing with him. It sucks. It breaks my heart knowing he is going to have to do this for the rest of his life. I know it was hard on me. It has been a struggle for Jessica too. I know things will be ok because God has a plan for me. He is such a great baby.
I am going to church this morning and then I have to work from 12:30 to 7 pm. Its going to be a busy on at work because of the football games but I will be ready. Hope everyone else out there has a Blessed Day.
Dennis came back from spending time with his mom. I missed him so much, I wish we didnt have to do the back and forth thing with him. It sucks. It breaks my heart knowing he is going to have to do this for the rest of his life. I know it was hard on me. It has been a struggle for Jessica too. I know things will be ok because God has a plan for me. He is such a great baby.
I am going to church this morning and then I have to work from 12:30 to 7 pm. Its going to be a busy on at work because of the football games but I will be ready. Hope everyone else out there has a Blessed Day.
Saturday, November 13, 2010
Not a good day for exercise!!!
Today I slipped, i havent exercised today and I feel so bad. I did walk alot at work but that is still not enough. I havent been feeling all that great today. Dint sleep well last night and have alot on my mind.
Dennis is with his mom tonight and I miss him so much. He will be with her all day tomorrow but ill get him back at night. I love him and jessica so much, they are my world. I wouldnt trade anything for them.....well.....no just kidding they are the greatest.
I am quickly finding out that being without God has cost me alot. Ive slipped for the past few years because all the hurt and pain. But I am quickly learning that with him I am a much happier person. I thank God each and everyday now for all the wonderful people I have in my life. Knowing that I have him there by myside is a big comfort. I have been fighting anxiety for a while now and things are finally getting better. And you know what....I am proud to say that I am a Christian and I know there are those who are not....It makes me heart broken to know that. I want everyone to know him just as I do.
Tomorrow is a new day and I will get back to doing what I need to do....so for now....bye ....till next time.......
Dennis is with his mom tonight and I miss him so much. He will be with her all day tomorrow but ill get him back at night. I love him and jessica so much, they are my world. I wouldnt trade anything for them.....well.....no just kidding they are the greatest.
I am quickly finding out that being without God has cost me alot. Ive slipped for the past few years because all the hurt and pain. But I am quickly learning that with him I am a much happier person. I thank God each and everyday now for all the wonderful people I have in my life. Knowing that I have him there by myside is a big comfort. I have been fighting anxiety for a while now and things are finally getting better. And you know what....I am proud to say that I am a Christian and I know there are those who are not....It makes me heart broken to know that. I want everyone to know him just as I do.
Tomorrow is a new day and I will get back to doing what I need to do....so for now....bye ....till next time.......
Thursday, November 11, 2010
VETERANS DAY!!!
We need to take a moment and remember all those that have died so that we are free. Next we need to thank our past and present military personel. It was my great pleasure to have served in the Army. And I am glad to say that my Dad derved his country for 20 years. So from me to everyone in the Militay is say THANK YOU!
Today has been an exahusting day at work. I feel like I have walked 10 miles. I was doing everything at the bowling alley , even tending bar...... I look forward to the start of cardio classes next week. Im going to be nervous because I dont know what is in store for me. Will I look like an Idiot, maybe, but I am going to give it my best shot. Im interested to see how quickly I will get worn out, but I know over time I will build up the stamina.
I bowled last night, i threw a 184, 209. and 221 game. Still have a was to go till I get back into the grove. I want to start bowling tournements again. I have one coming up in Decemeber its just a local tournemnet but its a start. I wish my body didnt hurt as much as it does but I can deal with the pain for a little fun in my life. Bowling has been a big part of my life and I let it go for the past few years, now its time for a little me time and do what I want to do.
Dennis is growing up so quickly I love it, but at the same time it breaks my heart to see my little boy grow. He is such a loving little boy, exspecially towards his Bop (grandad for those who dont know). He knows parts of his body and he is so funny when you ask him where his ears are, he likes to grab them and flap them like dumbo ears. EEEEWWWW has become one of his favorite words, if he doesnt like something he say eeeeewwww. LOL. I love him so much.
Jessica is Jessica.....a caring girl that I love..... she made me so proud the other day when she came home and told me that she got first place in a speech competion...she was so afraid to give her speech but she did a great job...now she is moving on to the next round of the competion and who knows maybe onto State competion. She did her speech on teen age self abuse and suicide. She has such an imaganitive mind and I wish she would use it more often.... I will post her speech in the near future. I am a proud dad and I love you Jessica.
Today has been an exahusting day at work. I feel like I have walked 10 miles. I was doing everything at the bowling alley , even tending bar...... I look forward to the start of cardio classes next week. Im going to be nervous because I dont know what is in store for me. Will I look like an Idiot, maybe, but I am going to give it my best shot. Im interested to see how quickly I will get worn out, but I know over time I will build up the stamina.
I bowled last night, i threw a 184, 209. and 221 game. Still have a was to go till I get back into the grove. I want to start bowling tournements again. I have one coming up in Decemeber its just a local tournemnet but its a start. I wish my body didnt hurt as much as it does but I can deal with the pain for a little fun in my life. Bowling has been a big part of my life and I let it go for the past few years, now its time for a little me time and do what I want to do.
Dennis is growing up so quickly I love it, but at the same time it breaks my heart to see my little boy grow. He is such a loving little boy, exspecially towards his Bop (grandad for those who dont know). He knows parts of his body and he is so funny when you ask him where his ears are, he likes to grab them and flap them like dumbo ears. EEEEWWWW has become one of his favorite words, if he doesnt like something he say eeeeewwww. LOL. I love him so much.
Jessica is Jessica.....a caring girl that I love..... she made me so proud the other day when she came home and told me that she got first place in a speech competion...she was so afraid to give her speech but she did a great job...now she is moving on to the next round of the competion and who knows maybe onto State competion. She did her speech on teen age self abuse and suicide. She has such an imaganitive mind and I wish she would use it more often.... I will post her speech in the near future. I am a proud dad and I love you Jessica.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Feeling Good
Today is going to be a great day!!! I plan on doing push ups and sit ups, dont know how many I will be able to do but im not going to kill myself.I plan on spending at least 1 hr working out. I also bowl tonight so I need to be able to pick up that bowling ball. Still havent had that elusive 300 game yet but one day I will get it.
I will let everyone now how it goes......
I will let everyone now how it goes......Tuesday, November 9, 2010
End of the Day!!!!
Today was a good day. I walked 2.5 miles and felt good afterwards. Dennis and me have been playing hard. He is wearing me out, I'm ready for bed and it is only 6:30 pm. I did good with eating today. I had baked BBQ chicken with corn and mashed potatoes for dinner. Lunch was a peanut butter and jelly sandwich a few chips and a coke. I really don't eat breakfast so I forced my self to eat Mini rice cakes and drank a glass of milk. No more food until tomorrow.......I'm gonna miss those midnight snacks. LOL. My body feels a lot better with each and every pound that I drop, so I have to keep that in mind to reach my goal.
If anyone around me wants to go walking send me a message and we will go.....I need a workout buddy. Would make things a lot easier...... Here in the next few weeks I am going to start Kickboxing classes and cardio classes. Once I get in shape I will be taking Brazilian Ju-Jitsu. I'm not looking to do any MMA fighting just thought that it would be a good intense workout.
My personal life still sucks, but I know it will get better. I know God has a purpose for me and I will be ready once the opportunity arises.
Hope everyone has a great night and I will see everyone tomorrow.
If anyone around me wants to go walking send me a message and we will go.....I need a workout buddy. Would make things a lot easier...... Here in the next few weeks I am going to start Kickboxing classes and cardio classes. Once I get in shape I will be taking Brazilian Ju-Jitsu. I'm not looking to do any MMA fighting just thought that it would be a good intense workout.
My personal life still sucks, but I know it will get better. I know God has a purpose for me and I will be ready once the opportunity arises.
Hope everyone has a great night and I will see everyone tomorrow.
Walking for my Health.
Me and Dennis just got back from our walk... What a beautiful day it is outside...sunny, 73 degrees. I feel like a million dollars. I love the stroller I have for Dennis i can actually run with him. I wasnt able to run far but its a start. Tomorrow is the beggining of strength workout. Push ups and sit ups. Man do I hate push ups, they are not for a person with long arms.
My eating habits are going to be a big challenge for me. I love so many things that are bad for me but I know I need to cut those things out of my life.
I think when Jessica gets home from school I am going to go for a walk with her. Me and her dont usually see eye to eye but we are working on that together and things are slowly getting better. I love her with all my heart and I want her to understand that I only want the best for her, being that she is a 14 year old teenager she doesnt always understand that. But in the long run I know she will thank me for giving her direction in life.
My little Gerber Baby
14 years later!!!!!!! What a change I miss my little Girl. Why cant they stay young forever?
I LOVE YOU JESSICA NICOLE !!!!!!
Day 1 Exercise
Cardio Day
Today I am starting out slow going to go for a 2 mile walk with my best buddy in the world. (Dennis). I have to work my way back into running, knees hurt all the time. Getting older sucks !!!! I have school later so not alot of time to do much of anything else exercise wise. By the end of my journey I want to be able to run at least 5 miles non-stop.
Later tonight I will be posting my diet.....till then let the good times roll......
Today I am starting out slow going to go for a 2 mile walk with my best buddy in the world. (Dennis). I have to work my way back into running, knees hurt all the time. Getting older sucks !!!! I have school later so not alot of time to do much of anything else exercise wise. By the end of my journey I want to be able to run at least 5 miles non-stop.
Later tonight I will be posting my diet.....till then let the good times roll......
Dennis resting!The Start of a new Life!!!
Let me start by saying, this is not going to be an easy task for me. I am not much of a writer, I will struggle at my goals in life but I will always remember that through God all things are possible.
My main Goal right now is to start a new healthier life and get down to 200 Lbs. I have a ways to go, currently i weigh 227. I plan on making some big changes in my life, quit smoking for good, eat healthier, and spend as much time possible with my beautiful children.
Here is a brief history about me. I am a 36 year old single Dad with 2 kids ( Jessica, 14 and Dennis 21 months). I have been married 2 times and just recently out of a 3 1/2 year relationship.( not that i wanted it to end, but i want everyone to be happy). I was raised by my Dad from the age of 5 and I am so happy for all he has done for me. I have been on the up and down roller coaster with my weight since I was 18. If you could believe I weighed 180lbs at 6'-4' tall after i finished Basic Training in the Army.
Fitness is the key to reaching my goal because I do not want to give up regular food. I am going back to the days of old. Going to start the day each way I did in the Army 18 Yrs ago. exercising!!!!!!
I look forward to an exciting journey in life and wish happiness and good health to all out there. I will be posting pics in the next couple of days.
My main Goal right now is to start a new healthier life and get down to 200 Lbs. I have a ways to go, currently i weigh 227. I plan on making some big changes in my life, quit smoking for good, eat healthier, and spend as much time possible with my beautiful children.
Here is a brief history about me. I am a 36 year old single Dad with 2 kids ( Jessica, 14 and Dennis 21 months). I have been married 2 times and just recently out of a 3 1/2 year relationship.( not that i wanted it to end, but i want everyone to be happy). I was raised by my Dad from the age of 5 and I am so happy for all he has done for me. I have been on the up and down roller coaster with my weight since I was 18. If you could believe I weighed 180lbs at 6'-4' tall after i finished Basic Training in the Army.
Fitness is the key to reaching my goal because I do not want to give up regular food. I am going back to the days of old. Going to start the day each way I did in the Army 18 Yrs ago. exercising!!!!!!
I look forward to an exciting journey in life and wish happiness and good health to all out there. I will be posting pics in the next couple of days.
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